I begin this blog very apprehensively. After much encouragement, here is my attempt to share my thoughts with those of you who read this.
I arrived here in Austin a little less than two years ago. If you told me two years ago (while I was sitting somewhere in Beijing, China) that I'd leave China to begin seminary and 2/3 of the way into it I would have grown into the woman I am today and accomplished all that has taken place, I am pretty sure I would have laughed right in your beautiful face. I continue to be mind blown by all that God has asked me to do and all that we are able to accomplish together.
I have been thinking about the fact that I only have 1 year left of my 3-year seminary program. I have thought about how terrified I was of all the unknowns before arriving here in Austin, site unseen. I have thought about the countless leaps of faith I have taken and how God has caught me with each leap and lifted me higher so that I might be able to serve Him better. And quite honestly, I can't think of any other place I would have rather been for this seminary experience. It has been more than I could have dreamt of. Just like my time in China, it has been difficult. There have been many sleepless nights and many tears shed.
While I think that I only have one more year left in this experience, I begin to think beyond that the thought that I STILL have one more year left. A very wise fellow seminarian told me one day that each semester brings its own lessons to be learned. And it certainly does and I've still got quite a but to learn. But I am realizing that I don't have to have all the answers and I don't have to do it all perfectly. I can stumble and fall down and skin my knees, only to be brought back up again by the most loving God.
Sometimes I'm in awe that I get to live this life, that I have the pleasure of living into a calling that I am still in process of trying to figure out. Sometimes I am scared to death of what my future may hold; the knowing and not knowing are both equally scary. But I find peace in knowing that whatever it is, wherever it is, that's the place God has called me to be. It won't be a mistake or unanswered call. There will be lessons learned and knowledge gained. It's exciting and terrifying.
In exactly two weeks, I will leave this lovely city to visiting, "the loveliest village on the plains." I've not been back to my sweet home Alabama in over a year. And how dearly I've missed it and the wonderful people who love and support me there. While there, I will have the honor of getting to meet my new nephew Payton, who I already love more than he could ever know. I will also have the great honor of giving a homily at my wonderful home church in Auburn, St. Dunstan's Episcopal Church on Tuesday night, June 19th. If you're in town please stop by and say "hello."
Yep, this is my life. I hope that you are just crazy enough, like me, and will follow me on this journey that is my life, with all of its up and downs.
Much love and peace to you all.